How Erim Kaur Turned Grief Into a Million-Pound Business | Cultured Chaos S2 Ep 4

Welcome to Cultured Chaos. I am your host, Anake, and I'm with the legendary Oasis Khan. Yes, brav. How are you, man? I'm good. Not bad. What's been happening? What's been happening? I feel like I haven't seen you in ages. It's been a while. It's been a while. Been busy. Been working. Well, you're up at like Angie's a changed man, man. An is a new an Angie is the Ashton Hall of Harold. He's up at what, 4:00 a.m. now, aren't you? 4 a.m. every day. um counting calories again. Uh I'm got this new thing attached to me. It's like a tag and it it just tells me what time is that you do on the ankle, brother. Yeah. Yeah. So with this one, it just does a lot more. Like it does it does so much more. But um you will see a transformation in me. But that's enough about me always. Today we have a very special guest, right? We're talking about someone who is more just more than a businesswoman. We're talking about a boss who created a blueprint entrepreneur, content creator, sold hundreds and thousands of products. Yes, the legendary the boss Aram Core. Everybody's hype, bro. That was hype. How are you? I feel very gassed up right now. As you should be. You're on Cultured Chaos, the best podcast in the world. I'm excited to be here, guys. Thank you. How are you? What have you been up to? Oh, good. It's raining horrendously right now, so I'm glad that we're inside. I I feel that whenever it rains in the UK now the conversation is so when are we moving to Dubai guys? Do you get that a lot? I mean I'm a resident in Dubai so I'm there between London and Dubai. See that's that's what that's what I'm telling you. Oh so have you got your gold visa in Dubai? Not gold visa. We got the business one cuz we own property or something like that. Oh I didn't know that straight from the jump. She's given us something we don't know about. Yeah, that's that's interesting. Would you ever move to Dubai? Me? Yeah. I don't know if I'd move to Dubai specifically cuz it's a bit hectic. I'd work there, but perhaps base myself a little bit further out. I've got family now, so it's a bit hectic for me, but it's warm and I hate this cold weather. I know he's itching to go, aren't you? Well, interestingly enough, my brother Moses, he's there, isn't he? He's there. He's actually left London and he's now living in Dubai. So, he's just so happy as well, doesn't he? I know. He's just chilling like every day. That's great, man. Bro, it's so hot, you know, every day. Why? I told Moses here, bro. What are you saying? Cuz that's how he talks. My dad's there right now and he's like, even the wind is hot. Like it hurts your eyes when it blows wind. That's the thing. Nice cuz here it rains in your eyes when you open them. So it's honestly, but I'm just like summertime there is when everyone kind of runs back to London. Exactly. It's dead. Dubai is dead in summer. Like no one's doing work. Like no one's responding. Everyone's out of offices on. But then come like September time where you know school time starts, everyone is on it and I love that time. But would you rather be too hot or too cold? Cuz it's like 50° there in June, isn't it? It's insane. No, I'd rather be too cold. What about you guys? N I'd rather be sweating and happy than cold and miserable. Everything you're cold and my shoulder starts to hurt. My back hurts. But when it's hot, it's like I'm sweating. You get a bit tan. You look a bit healthy. No, no. I mean, I'm too much into gym not to love the summer. I saying sure. But we went Norway. I remember going Norway. And it was just like, where we going? And then Mrs. was like, yeah, it's like a ski trip kind of vibe. And I was like, okay. She was like, make sure you pack up something warm, man. And I didn't understand. I thought double layers. It was cold. When I say cold, I was like, yeah, I'm never doing Norway again, boy. This the vest and that was it in you. Oh, mate. It was even the what you call it? The things that's meant to keep you warm. Even the what you call it? What's it called? I don't know what it's called thermal. Thermals. John, did you wear longer? Yeah, I had to buy it from there cuz I forgot the Yeah. Yeah. I was like, but the gyms in Dubai are so cool. Yeah, they are. You seen them, right? You love it. The gyms. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So cool. I like how you tried to change your I don't know what I was doing. See, a lot of people don't know this, but you're proper into your fitness as well, isn't it? Yeah. I feel like I was training with Ikim for four years, and that was like a private studio. It was just me and her, girl time, and I was confident. I knew how to use all her machines. I was familiar. And then a year ago, I joined an actual gym and I was like, it's a different vibe, isn't it? It's a different vibe. Okay. Especially if you go at certain times. I've joined a gym. We've made We've got a tripod now. And I get that you want to film content. I get it. We film content, but it's crazy. And and the thing is being a girl in a gym is a different It's tough being a girl in a gym cuz guys are absolute imbeciles. Still still, bro. Come on. Like you get it, I get it. And we're not even girls. So I mean, yeah, that's what I'm saying, bro. We're a girl in the gym, bro. Guys are thirsty. Like young, they stand in groups with their phones and Oh, yeah. She's here. Oh, look. Aim is here. I know. I have it. They'll they'll DM me afterwards. And cuz I go to a really small independent gym. So, everyone that goes, "What's the name and location of this for the viewers?" Everyone that goes is like my neighbors. We all see each other in and around the environment. So, I do think there's a bit of respect there for sure. But I started with the classes cuz I was doing PT for 4 years. I was used to just going in, being told what to do, brain turns off. And for me, that's what I loved about the gym. I didn't want to be there counting my reps, working out what machine to go to. So, I just started doing classes. And classes generally are girls. And there is such a nice community of girls there. Like, you go, you're walking through, hey, hey, hey. So, I think that's been one of the really big contributing factors for me being so consistent with that gym over the last year. That's talking about fitness because I was meant to ask you this later on. I'm just going to go and shoot at you now because it's just so organic, man. But you're a vegetarian for religious reasons, right? And then does that affect your fitness and stuff because I guess so. I guess so. It's a bit difficult to reach the amount of protein that you need to have in a day. Yeah. And especially me, like I'm not super consistent when it comes to like my diet and everything. So I'll eat when I can. I really believe in intuitive eating. If my You do too. I'm like that. Yeah. If you're hungry, eat. That's it. Or if you're craving sugar or craving chocolate, I'm thinking I might not be scientifically correct here, but like my body needs something that's in that chocolate. I will give myself that chocolate. Um, but you know, when you're doing it intuitively, sometimes you do be so busy that you're forgetting to eat. So I'm not I'd say the nutrition element of my fitness routine needs to be improved for sure. But there there is elements of when you have chocolate it makes you feel better. There's things that releases that actually makes you feel good about has a snack drawer in his house. Like you do you know? No I don't anymore cuz I because my daughter can reach to the snack start open. She goes cookie one cookie for me on a pen. So I' got to get rid of the snack drawer now. So no snack draw anymore. And what's in your snack drawer? Oh what isn't? I just used to go in the snack draw. What should I do here? You're asking the wrong question. It is what isn't in the snack drawer. There's from Doritos to Pringles to cats. It's a tuck shop. I know if in school you had a tuck shop. We have one in our house. But so funny. Since I've um started doing some mindset work and I've actually got a mindset coach and it's completely changed my life. I promise you. It's insane. So, I'm really looking after what I eat and I'm actually a bit of a pescatarian now. Okay. If because it helps me just shred. So, I can understand being veggie and it helping. When did you what? I told you I've changed, bro. I haven't seen you in three weeks and everything changed. Everything is is different. I'm using some uh oils by everything. But my beard, why you shining today, bro? But um talking about that, I want to know um like other parts of your personality that people don't know about. Is it is like I want to know like you know the real Aram, you know? Yeah. I mean when you walked in here you were like what's your star sign and I think I really can in certain business environments I can give off okay she's a typea she's an organized she's a leader but the truth of the matter is you know you can ask my friend she's sat here I'm a very follower person by nature I love yeah someone to be in charge tell me where to be tell me where to go and I can just easygoing just flow along with it like if I'm traveling with someone I'm not holding my passport I haven't been the one to check in was I the one who packed my bag I mean depends who's asking Yes. But realistically, I I'm not thinking much. So, what if you're traveling on your own? Do you then carry the passport? I presume you like your bag. I do. I do. I do. I can handle it if I have to. But like I haven't booked a flight myself, I'd say like maybe 5 years. Like it's just all I've got good buffers in life compared to what we have to do with honestly. Carry the passport, do this, get to the airport on time. I'm not going to all I'm going to say is when you become a parent one day in future cuz you're very young still it's it's life changes every your world turns upside down in a good way obviously but it's it's it's chaos it's is literal chaos culture it's culture chaos you have to you got no choice but to take certain responsibilities and that's why I assumed I was like you're a Virgo because your energy's giving off you know that's okay I respect that by the end of this you're going to be like oh no she's defo Aquarius Yes. Yeah. Both both of us viros. Yeah. Both of us viros. Yeah. Interesting. So it was it actually is not that interesting to be honest. Why did you lie? One second. Wait then before I jump on to the next bit. Why did you just lie then? To make what? Why? Just to make us feel a little bit because you were so not interested that we're viros. You interesting? No. Because Eram, you actually didn't give a that we were viros. And I want to know why. So burgers is one of my favorite star signs because they do be the one that's a leader and they be handling stuff and I can just like follow along, bro. Yeah, you do be handlers. I I I do consider myself a leader. Otherwise, I I'm the leader of my family. Oh, bro. But um you know, today we've got your product here today. I want to talk a little bit about that and how you got started. I know you've as been asked this a thousand times, but please tell us because our generation want to know about it. And it is my pleasure to share this story. Like it's so close to my heart. Yeah. So I think a lot of my brand and who I am online is built off the fact that I lost my mom when I was very young. I was 8 years old. But prior to losing her, I would literally she was the one at the school gates. My mom was so beautiful and she had really long hair. So, you know, like I'm sure your daughters can relate, like they see something in their mom and whatever that thing is, that's what beauty is. And for me, my mom had freckles and she had long hair and I was always like, "Oh my god, long hair is just the definition." And healthy hair is the definition of what is beautiful to me. So, as she passed when I was 8 years old, I was in custody with my dad and I was living with my dad and my brother. That was it. So, when my dad would take my younger brother to the barber, number one, all over natural back, he would take me. You got No, no, no. No, not that. I was going to say that's what my brother was getting. I was going to say I thought she said I just to clear she didn't get the number one. That's how it started. It's in proper men's barber like with clippers. They would just get after doing my brother's head. They would just get the clippers and they would clip my hair like in a little bob. My face does not carry a bob. And it definitely didn't back then. So I'd be sat in my dye. No, you're rocking a bobby. It will suit your neck. Yeah. Maybe one day. I would sit in my daddy's kitchen on the weekends. My dad would drop us to the grandparents and we would be talking about all these different concoctions that we could do. You guys can relate properly with your moms and stuff. Their kitchen has everything inside it of course. Right. So we were trying like day in the hair, yogurt in the hair. We were doing egg in the hair, honey in the hair, different types of oils. And a big part of South Asian culture is oiling your hair. But growing up in such a like why mixed environment, there was no other Asian. So me going to school with like black seed oil, castor oil, or mustard oil smelt awful. I looked greasy. I looked a mess. And maybe it was doing good for my hair, but it wasn't doing good for me. So we then kept on experimenting for 6 years until we landed upon the formula that's inside my bottle today. And this is eight pure oils and each of them one has a different molecular weight and a different benefit and they're balanced to perfection like down to the 0.1%. Yeah, you've done your research and and all sorts. So, one second. The way she said molecular, this isn't just some kind of thing where you got said as well, bro. Well done, bro. Thank you. She's educating me today. So, like this isn't just something where you know twoies got together and made in the kitchen and is like you've actually studied this, right? Yes. So, I've done my tririccology Oh, wow. foundation year and that taught me all the theory behind hair, scalp, chemical structure of products. Super informative. But that was after I launched. Obviously when I launched this, I did it properly. Like we got all the business certification, the stability testing, made it in a lab. Really, really long. It took me a year to launch the business. I ideated it in Jan 2019 and I launched December 2019. So I did it properly. But the biggest piece of advice that someone actually gave me when I was calling around to all the different factories, obviously I didn't have that much money. I was working in a nightclub for six years and I saved up my tips. So I was That's where I've seen No, I'm joking. maybe, but cuz I only had so much money, my order quantity was quite low. It was only 250 units. No one was really taking on board a little girl calling up little voice. I was 24 at the time. They weren't taking me seriously. So, they were like, "Oh, now we can't take on your board your business." Cuz they're thinking, "It's going to be a one time 250 units. She's going to drop it and then we're not going to get repeat customer." Okay. One lady turned around and said to me, she rejected me, but gave me the best advice. She said, "Listen, where do you want your business to be?" And I said, "I want to be in retailers." She goes, "What type?" I goes, "Harros, Selfridges, Harvey X." And she said, "Listen, those are big, serious retailers. They are going to need every single example of paperwork that you've had, of testing that you've done, of certification that you've had down for to the very first bottle that you sold." And I said, "All right, I'm not going to be able to do this this and do it in a kitchen. let me make sure that I'm doing it first of all legally, but second of all, I'm doing it right by my customers. I'm not mixing it in a sink or something like that. That gave me so much confidence now when I'm having conversations with the current retailers and I'm like, you know, ask me, test me. I've got all my customer service reports. I've got all the tracking of emails. But that I think is a testament to how rejection really did turn into something positive. And I will say the guy that did take on my business, he obviously we sold 105,000 bottles now. He made the right decision. 105 deserves a round of applause. 105. That's impressive. I was reading like you turned over like 4.2 million like pounds. Like that's that's crazy for someone like it's you're still under 30 and you're that's insane. Yeah. I remember like I was so young, 24, like my voice was different and like my dad has a proper like booming deep like little bit cockney sounding voice like he sounds legit on the phone businessman. And I remember going up to him cuz I lived at home at the time and I was like, "Dad, please take this guy on the phone, talk to him serious cuz they're not believing me that I've got something good here." And he was like, "No, cuz if I get involved now, everyone's going to forever say that it was me that done it." And I was like, "All right." So only after six months when we launched internationally and we made £250,000 in one day. Yeah, it was crazy. And I didn't even know what money was back then. I was like, "What's this on the screen?" Then he was like, "All right, come. You're doing this properly. Let me get involved." And then he helped me with, you know, fulfillment and everything like that. Insane. Yeah. But I had to prove it to him. No, the fact that you turned grief into purpose and and and you know, is is is you like to have that strength. Where did that come from? Is is that something that you find a power in God? Do you find is it your beliefs? Is it Where does that come from? That strength or is your family really supportive? Because you seem very close to your father. Definitely. I'd say like maybe people that grew up in a single parent household can relate. But you know, my dad was 29 and he had custody of two very, very grieving, very very hurt children. and seeing how hard he worked to grow his business and the businesses that he created after that. I was so intimately involved with the success of those. I was working since I was 14 in his businesses. I look back now and I'm like it wasn't that I was motivated is that I was running from poverty. I was running from the fear of knowing what it's like in a single parent household where you're relying on one person. How can one person he was so young? So I think I'm also motivated to do it not for my dad as a thank you but for my dad as yo you got someone backing you now you're not on your own. So you know being a female do you feel that you have a responsibility to represent your culture and your and your background and stuff? I think so. I think in my own way you know I think Punjabi the there's such a diverse community. There's so many ways to represent your Punjabi culture. For me, you know, I was talking to you about this earlier and like I grew up in an area of London that there's no Asians. There's everything else, but there's no Asians. Yeah. Yeah. You too, right? I remember. I was only Asian. I totally understand. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Always can relate to that. You're brown. Right. Right. And for me, I didn't really have so much the culture cuz I've got a very small family and you know, my grandparents moved here when they were like in their teens. Oh, wow. So, they're very Yeah. English. My dad, my mom was born here. So I grew up very very English. Did you did you suff like did you get any racism or anything like that or when you were growing up being around that you know like I think the way I look it's kind of hard to place me and especially the way I talk and the way I behave sometimes people don't know where I'm from. So I think it was kind of hard for someone to be racist towards me cuz they were like we don't know what to make fun of her for. So I didn't feel like I really suffered it necessarily. Okay. Um but I know that I witnessed it at my school with the likes of people coming from like African background, Caribbean background. saw it firsthand and I was like, "Okay, this is happening." Wow. Mhm. Did you guys feel that ever? I mean, I got it every day. He did. I got in fights at school every day cuz I got called a py. So, they combined my speech and my race, which is a for effort, I think, personally. But I mean, yeah, I'm used to every it's I I became so thick skinned to the whole thing that I had I'm from Leighton. So there was there were so many Asians like the ethnic minority were the gore in our right. So yeah. So as was opposite. You were the majority. We were the majority doing the bullying. So yeah. Well, no. We were doing the bullying. But but yeah, I was like go back to where you came from. Here we go. That's funny. So when did you feel you fully em embraced your cultural your Punjabess? Look, you can't run away from it. You're there. You're wearing the desi outfits. We've seen what you do and and you know, I think that you're representing Punjabi women in such a beautiful way. you're a strong entrepreneur and a businesswoman and I think it speaks volumes because there's hardly women out there like yourself. So naturally, whether you like it or not, there will be a sense of responsibility that you're going to have like and I'm proud to take that. Yeah. You know, I think like to choose to put yourself out out there, it's not a choice whether you're going to be a role model or not. You're going to be a role model and you have to accept that as part of your responsibility. and I'll do my utmost best to do right by the Punjabi community. I think for me the first experience of being immersed into the cultural side of it was at uni. So I went to University of Manchester. A lot more exposure to the Punjabi community. I was part of sick society the committee and everything like that. So I was like I was like whoa. You know people coming up to me asking what my surname was and I was telling them thinking they wanted to add me on Facebook but they were asking cuz they wanted to know. Yeah. They wanted to know like my back background thing. That's a typical death thing though, isn't it? Everyone's like, "Oh, you know, what's your name? What's your background? Where you from? Who's your mom? Who's your dad?" And then it's, you know, all the other questions like that. Oh, yeah. The cast, they ask everything. And do you think South Asia is the nosiest people in the world? Yes. They're the most judgy pe people in the world. They always got something to say. I mean, do you get a lot of like online hate? Yeah, I would say that like the way that people approach me, I think where it's like, okay, we can see on the surface, you know, educated, got a business, like looks after herself d people try and find a little bit of a in my armor, but what they'll do then is they'll make something up. So, I had it where it went viral that my mom my mom's death certificate. So, they got her death certificate, like the London borrower and everything. Wow. Yeah. But they changed her name to a Nigerian name and they changed her birth year date. So they made out that she was like African and a lot older and there's nothing good or bad about that. But it was such a change in the way that was quite disturbing to disturbing. It went that far. How weird. Horrendous. You could have just kept it the way that it was. And that's a bit interesting to people seeing her death certificate. But yeah, they just do stuff and it's kind of confusing to me the angle that they're going at cuz I'm a bit like you were weird. Even me the other day I posted a Tik Tok and imagine just eight Lamborghinis and we had a campaign to shoot outside uh big up chas. Their food great by the way. Really good. Yeah. I mean also shout out as well. Listen, this girl has had some crazy weight loss journey. She's now PT. So yeah, big up to you as well. Yeah, she's who I was with for 4 years. I was going to say by not she smashed it. Um, so we I just record a little video. I was like, "Oh, there's eight Lamborghinis guys outside this." And then the comments, the hate was just like, "Probably a rental. Probably this." But I was like, "There's not even one like mashallah. You know what? Well done, brother." Like, are you surprised? You should be used to it now, bro. I'm not even 1% surprised. Do you know the next TikTok after I was like, "Guys, I lured you in. I knew exactly what you were going to say, and I did it on purpose to show you and expose this is the hate that it gets." Because in the UK, even the South Asians, they like online especially obviously not in real life cuz in real life I get shown so much love but online they're not going to argue with you when you're in real life because size of you but online it's like um we only like make up 5 to 7% of of the community and they all so much hate. It's like we get enough anyway and it's always you use a 3649 258 29B always. I know the one that the same people and it's nuts honestly isn't it cuz it's easy to hide behind a screen and but I feel it's really disturbing for people to go that far to someone's mother's but that's how do you mean that's how pardon my the world is now bro yeah the world is there's horrible people out there but that's that's crazy honestly to go to that extent they really care that's what I'm saying but you you affected someone's life. See, that's how I I think about it. You've affected someone's life that much cuz I don't hate someone enough to go to that extent. So, either it's someone who actually knows you, which would be even weirder. I don't know how to find my mom's death certificate online. That's what I'm saying. How did they just get it, man? That's madness. And that's something so deep as well. Something so close to home. Like, it's it's it's insane. That grief that you've dealt with, the trauma that you're carrying is is deep. And what you've turned it into is insane. And I think a lot of people will get jealous. Of course they will. That's what it is. Hating is the biggest compliment in the world. I say 100%. It really is. Honestly, it is. And I think the way you So, how do you deal with the abuse then if if you do get any? So, this is my thing. Like I'm an ambassador for Pandora, Sky TV. I work with an Kiss Nails. These are all massive worldwide global brands. I could never look my people at these companies in the eye and say, "Oh, yeah. I responded back to that comment." I'm not risking my bag. So when people are like, "Oh, you got beef with this, you got beef with that." I'm like, "Listen, it's not beef because I'm not responding. I've never responded. If someone wants to screenshot and fake it through, I've never responded." And that's the biggest thing is like people that don't get the industry and they think that I could ever ever ever turn around and attack someone or do something and and get away with it have lost their minds. I could never do it. I'm never ever going to risk losing the collaborations of the brands that I've worked with for years and built up my relationship with these people for the sake of just, you know, if I was to speak up against it 100% there would be millions of views. There would be a huge hate crowd going against other people that have attacked me. It's not worth it to me. Why would I lose the bag? It's true. So, you've built everything up on your own and you've smashed it and you've come this far. Now, if you went back to your younger self or if anyone younger is thinking about doing the same sort of thing, what advice would you give them to help them start? You know, I'm here with my friend. She's a teacher. And a lot of the kids come up to me, they're like 14, 15, and they're like, "Oh, how'd you become an influencer, miss? How'd you do this? That's brilliant." But that's what the world is now, isn't it? They all want it, don't they? And I literally say to them, I'm like, "Don't do it. Don't do it." Because if I knew that someone was going to pull my mom's death certificate out or that was going to accuse me of, I would be like, "Oh, I uh think twice." You know, at that time, you know, I know you guys have been in this game for absolutely like two decades now, right? Yeah. At least. Yeah. Yeah. Two decades. Yeah. I've been 9 years. I'm a Buddha. Even internet when I I think internet just started when I was doing it. Get off the phone. I'm using internet. So, yeah. You never had that problem. Do you know how long when I was growing up in secondary school it would take to download one song? No, I don't. Oh, bro. Remember those days? Four hours. CD. I used to have a CD like mixer in my car and a CD. Four hours. I think they've had CDs, man. They know what that is. You know what that is? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, I know what a CD player is, mate. Oh, man. But yeah, I mean because the younger generation now, if you ask them, what do you want to do? I want to be a YouTuber. I want to be an influencer. I want to be. So that's seen to them because of how it's portrayed cuz they only see the final product. They don't see what it takes to get that and to get there and the journey you have to take. You know, I just I wouldn't discourage anyone from doing it because I think if we all approach social media that we have a unique purpose to be there, whether it's, you know, inspiring people to be in touch with their culture, inspiring people on their fitness journey, you know, myself is there to be a guide for young girls that don't have a mom or sisters or young boys. I want to teach everyone. That's my specific purpose. If I lead with that, that is a lot bringing a lot more good into the world than the bad that I receive from it. But I think when you kind of come into it not knowing what's going to happen and not being prepared, that's when things can get a little bit scary and that's when you see people suffering from mental health illnesses as a result of social media. And you don't even need to be an influencer to suffer that on social media as well. So I would want people to be prepared and I would want them to come I would want them to come to the table with a really unique point of view and stick to that. Remember that. Yeah. Do you do you feel that you have to stick to certain guidelines now? Do you feel a little bit boxed in and do you get like a lonely because of that reason? I feel, you know, people ask me about my business and I will always say to them, right, I've got, you know, me, my dad, my team, but the amount of stakeholders I have in my business is the 700,000 followers that I have across Instagram and Tik Tok. I never feel lonely when I've got my phone in my hands. I've got my community with me and I feel a strong connection to them. Having said that, you know, the people in my life, they've known me since I was 14. If I was to introduce you to any of my friends, they've been knowing me since secondary school. My best friend is from primary school, four years old. We your best friends. Wow. So, there's never that loneliness. I think you guys can relate to that. Like pre and post, you know, popping off publicly or becoming famous in you guys case. There's a difference in the way that people treat you and that can be lonely. You can be surrounded by tons of people in a room and you can feel alone. But maintaining those relationships with people that knew before anything, not that I have anything, but before anything, I think has been such a valuable asset to me moving forward, staying grounded, staying humble, no, remembering who I am. And to be honest, some days it will be looking that person in the eye that's known me since I was four years old, has seen every version of me, and knowing that they're still by my side. I can't be those things that people call me online, or I can't be as good as people call me online as well. Sometimes you need that person to bring you back down to earth. Oh, to keep you grounded. That's it. That's it. Yeah. Yeah. Because if you was around yes men or yes women then you would become a very arrogant person or anyone would. Yeah. True. I think it's important to have real people around you. That's why I hang out with the waste a lot. Yeah man. It's important. I mean in our outcome I mean our journey it's strange how us two have held on to our friendship still you know because finding genuine people around you but it's it's it's it's rare and it's tough and as you get older I used to have loads of friends but as you get older your circle does this and now it's like I can count on my hand how genuine friends I've got and I still got a few fingers pair and that's it. I love that though. I love that cuz you know when we were at uni and school it was cool to have loads of Facebook friends. You knew everyone from all the other schools and everything like that but now I'm just it's just so not a flex. Yeah. Not honestly. Have that handful of really close friends that really know you that really ride with you? Do you get annoyed sometimes? You get approached for pictures and stuff like No, I really like it. I told you these people built my brand for me. You loved it, bro. You this guy. I liked it for a week and then it got a bit like every week since our show. Yeah. Reality TV. I'm going to ask you about that later on actually. But he was like, "Do you want to go Westfield boys? Let's go west." Did it once and you like loved it. We went westfield every And then it was Yeah. Can I get a picture? Some people he would just be like, "No." Then you I'm joking. Come. I'm sorry. That was That was actually You loved it. You loved it. We We did every I had different gang signs every week. I was like, "Yeah, man. I'm famous. So, so would you have any advice because you do men's stuff as well? So, guys like Angie and I who have like beards and and like are into our grooming. Yeah. Would you have any advice for us or any products in your line that I could use to Yeah. help me? First of all, invoice me later. Thanks for the setup. See, it's all right. I always say to people, your beard needs two things. One, you need to exfoliate. So, I've got a scrub that you use underneath because what you're not realizing is there's a lot of like food debris. There's a lot of cotton debris from pulling your t-shirt on and off. There's a lot of dead skin that's there. And people will sit there and be like, "Oh man, I've got a patch in my beard. Why isn't it growing? I can't diagnose anything." But a lot of the times, a baby hair is just not strong enough to push past a lump of hard water or a lump of dead skin. So, you need to exfoliate, proper detox your beard once a week. Because you know men who shave, they're manually exfoliating their beard. So they're getting that fresh skin. But when you're not shaving, you're not really cleaning down there. You're not exfoliating. You're not allowing that natural process of the skin to shed. So you're saying our beards are like dirty. Yeah. Right now. Firstly, I didn't know that. I didn't know how much she knew about how cuz I was going to be like, "What do you know about beard? You don't shave. You're a woman. What what girl who don't know about it?" But that's deep. That's actually deep. Shut up. And he come back. Andrew's ready for the car. Yeah. I was just waiting to You were locked in. Yeah. And I was Yeah. I was ready to just go in at you for a second. And then I went, "Wait one second. Let me back up." I was like, "My bed go home." Microscope at home. I will come with my microscope. We need to like under the beard once a week. Yes. And I've got a scrub and it has chemical and physical exfoliants. And you know them little beads. A lot of people don't like them because they get stuck in the hair. Beads are supposed to like help. I've heard cuz I did it on my skin before. Exactly. But, you know, when you're doing it in hair, it can get stuck. But my beads are made of wood cellulose, so they actually dissolve when you get under hot water, so you don't get stuck. Especially for someone like me. I'd be sat on the sofa for like a week later pulling the bits. Exactly. So, those are Do you sell the scrub and like the whole set? Yeah. We got a beard kit. So, it comes with a scrub and then it comes with this oil. So, once you've exfoliated everything, put the oil on because this has all the nutrients that your hair that your scalp and your beard needs to actually grow healthy hair. But what I'm seeing as a tririccologist under training tririccologist under the microscope, people are just layering stuff on stuff on stuff. You've got dead skin, you got hard water, you got a bit of dirt, you got a bit of sweat, and then they're putting on the oil and they're like, "It's not working." I feel disgusting right now, don't I? Like I haven't like cleaned my face in like 20 years now. What gets rid of the white hairs? Do you Does it do that? Embrace the white, bro. He's really weird about the white stuff. I love the white. I think white's cool. Silver Fox in it, bro. Come on. I know, but if they could just just a little bit more. Yeah. You know, do you use that uh touch of gr? No, no, nothing. Never. No. You haven't used anything? No. You only on the show. I used to use that powder on my head before before Turkey. So, an used to have this powder that he Yeah. The fibers and then we jumped in water and the water went all black. No, it didn't. No, it didn't. It just that area where I was. Actually, it went back and I went, "H, bro. What's that black stuff around you? And it goes into my hair. But it stayed all right for the for the scene. So, as we're talking about hair and stuff, if any guys out there are in that process of maybe I need to go turkey or something or are using the spray and stuff, right? Right. Right. Is do we can we use that in our hair or is there something else we use in our hair because I feel I might need to use it. Yeah. I've actually got a few few friends that have recently come from Turkey. Would that would that be okay for them to use and stuff? Yeah, obviously speak to the doctor first. But this is 100% natural. The thing that is special about this is those baby hairs, A, it's going to help it to anchor the hair into the scalp more, but B, when you are growing new hairs, those hairs are so like fragile and gentle. You want going to want to use this to give it that moisture. Anything moisture has elasticity. You know, when something's dry, it's very brittle. It can break very easily. This is going to help ensure that those hairs that you do have are going to be less susceptible to breakage cuz, you know, you're paying thousands of pounds to have them implanted into your scalp. Imagine you lose just one. That's like a quid or something. Do you know what I mean? You don't want to be losing it. So, this is going to help it to maintain it. So, you've had good reviews and you've sold thousands of these already, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So, we're one of the highest um rate I think we're the most awarded indie hairare brands in the UK, but one of the highest rated hair care brands on Trust Pilot as well, and we respond to all our reviews. So, are you only a available in England right now or is it an international thing? Is it like we're in South Asian countries where there are a lot of Asians with? So we fulfill from the UK but we ship internationally but we also have local partners in terms of retailers especially in the Middle East. So we're on N sheet in the Middle East. Yeah. Debums in the UK but most of 99% of our sales are DTOC directly from our proprietary website and we fulfill it ourselves. We have our own warehouse. Do you not feel to like uh reach out like and go to India that India that Indian market and Pakistan to be fair would be massive for yourself for your brand. I would love to do that. So I was talking to my marketing girl today, marketing lady and she was saying that in order to sell in India without a distributor and without a retailer offering to be your exclusive, you have to have an Indian person Yeah. as the owner of the business in order to get your license. And we don't have an Indian person. You got family back home? No one? None. Oh, you haven't? I'm Indian. I don't have the Doesn't that count? I I did say that. I did because I was like, my dad was born here, but both his parents are from there. So, that should count because I lived over there for 3 years and I wanted to start a few businesses there, but I couldn't do it because I needed to do it with someone who's obese, right? But I thought that if you had family there or some part of your family was born there because I struggled to get a visa cuz my grandparents were born in my parents were born in Pakistan. So I'm I'm sure you can if your grandparents have roots there and were they born in India? I'm sure you can. Yeah. Talk later. That's a huge that's like that's massive. That's like a billion. Very saturated though. Everyone does. But the thing is if you come from here I agree. That's a huge thing cuz I came from here and I went there. I was like British. Yeah. Brown. My god. Yeah. And they'll it'll be huge honestly. And if you come and it looks slick and blah blah blah cuz over there image and style and branding and like international brands are a really big thing cuz it's cool to have it cuz it's not available there and it's from England you see. So you you would explode over there honestly. Let me have another conversation. We'll try. Yeah. Do you remember when we spoke to Cades and she was saying like she's too like she's too brown for the white crowd and too white for the brown. Yeah. Do you kind of like feel that way sometimes? I mean if I was to compare myself to someone who's an Indian native, yeah, I definitely would feel like an English girl. Um I do feel that where my whole bubble is London, I really do be fitting into the culture and the society here. Do you guys feel that way ever? at times. I mean I think the whole reason I started we started cultured chaos was to kind of like hit the subject and say you know what there is that identity crisis for a lot of us because we we do suffer with that that look when Pakistan's playing cricket I'm like Pakistan like who do you support if if if the cricket was on England or India first of all not watching the cricket second of all England see no but I've got a lot who would though no but people are going to cancel me now for saying English. Don't worry, they're going to cancel your dad there. Who would your dad might get cancelceled for? Yeah, but you know what I'm saying? I touched the wire. Someone's going to cancel me for that. Who would your dad support? Probably England cuz we're here, right? Yeah. So, it feels like you can celebrate everyone. That's why. Yeah. So, I was because you're born here or there. Cuz I was born here, but I lived there till I was like six. I couldn't speak English. So, I mean, I've got that. But mine's just my parents' influence, right? Yeah. They still have that because they were born cuz football even if Pakistan had a football team. Actually, no. I would support Pakistan. You're a lawyer. Football team, bro. But I don't sport. I can't say I don't support England. Cuz I do sport England in football. Yeah. And every other sport. It's only the cricket. We feel a little bit which is weird, isn't it? It's weird. It's an Asian sport, right? It's an Asian sport. Who originated it was? No, it's a British sport. They England invented literally all the sports in Asia. They were they they didn't invent everything. Bro, bro, you cannot come you cannot say England did not invent cricket. England invented everything. Yeah. We've been reading English history books growing up. How do we know who wrote that? Do you know what I mean? That's that's a strong that's a strong opinion. That's that's reaction. That's going viral. We've got one. Welcome. Well done. I know. That's sick. Brexit. Don't get me started on that. Say all the words. Religion, politics. Say all of them in one go now. That's crazy, man. So, yeah, you you'd support England. Yeah. And cricket. You're stressing me out now cuz I think that's the wrong answer. I don't watch. There is no such thing. Wrong answer. I think that everyone's entitled to their own Yes. And the thing is the world is so culturally meshed now that in our parents and ancestors and elders times it was that you were all in the same community. We've all merged now. So I think that there is no wrong answer of whether you're and do you think we're way past that as well? I know I'm saying right or wrong answer per my dad watching this and he's going to be like what do you mean? So I might get it wrong by him but I think then we can invite him on the next podcast. Yeah. I came on here to set the facts straight. That'd be hilarious. Actually, actually, I want you and your dad on one of the episodes. I think that'd be great to have the both of them. Honestly, that would be insane. Um, I just want to touch up on beauty standards in this day and age. Uh, I don't know. How did When did you Wow. I never thought I'd hear that sentence come out of An's mouth. This is a moment right now for me. Go on. Anyway, ask ask again. I want to hear it again. Go on. Sorry. So, let's talk about beauty standards for a second. One second. The oil's working. No, I'm joking. I was going to say, um, Kim Kardashian's mom, what's her name? Cristana. That's it. Faceless. Isn't that the dad? Sorry. Isn't that the dad? No. Oh, wait. Have you seen it? What? So, I've never watched an episode of it. No. Forget the show. Kim Kardashian's mom is like 70 years old. Yeah, I know who mom is. She's literally got a brand new face where she looks exactly like Kim Kardashian. It's insane. is. So, I just want Eram's opinion on this on beauty standards today and what do you make of all of that stuff? First of all, I think it's incredible what modern science, modern medicine can do cuz I was shocked when I saw her. But I think she looks stunning and I think she looks amazing. She looks amazing. My kill me, but yeah, she looks amazing. Thank you. Yeah. But you know what it is? I think every woman, if they were in her shoes, so public facing, you have all that money, you have access to the best doctors in like LA or wherever the doctors are in America. I think every woman in her shoes would probably do it. Not not 100%. But most women 100% most all of them would. I think because it's that if you can, you would. Yeah. I mean, I think there's so much power to like aging naturally. And you know, you and I were speaking about this earlier like I look a bit like my mom. And I think if I was to change my nose or my lips or something like that, I would be dishonoring the face that's left of her on this earth. But I think Yeah. But Christa, I think being so Hollywood and so big, like she must be under, you know, we're talking about trolling. Can you imagine what they're getting? She must be under so much pressure to look a certain way. The only thing is is like I worry that, you know, being 70, my daddy is 76. My daddy could not do the things that people would expect Jenna to do physically. Inside Chris Jenner is still 70some. Do you know what I mean? So, I hope she still gets treated with that respect of being a grandmother and not I hope she's not getting pushed just because she looks so young now. That's such a deep take. I want to see what she looks like now. I'm curious. It's in You're going to be mind blown if I if I show it to you. Are you actually going to take it out? Yeah. Yeah. I'll just show it to you in a second. It's actually like you're going to be like I actually want your reaction from this. What is it? Chris Jenner. What should I write? New face. Mhm. or like facelift or something images. There you go. Wait, why did I think you were searching on Tik Tok? No, I Googled it. Shut up. I should I should have it. T's the new search engine. I know. I'm I'm so I'm such a millennial. Wow. I mean, on respect. So, uh when are you going to go? I mean, I'm like, how's this? Is that good? No. See, I I mean, I'm not. So, you know, with your brand, like that's why I asked that question cuz I was just like, cuz it's a very natural sort of and like it's it's very organic, isn't it? So, you wouldn't ever like Are you asking if she's had anything? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm joking. Have you? Not yet. You look a little bit botoxy today. No, look, my for my forehead moves. Mine doesn't. You know, yours doesn't move. No, definitely. No, I swear. Wahi, I have not had Botox. You But when I went Turkey to do my hair from the front bit, the hairline was crazy. It was doing the whole McDonald's thing. But um look, it's called a widow's peak, isn't it? I think men's men's pattern baldness comes in different shapes. So, you had M shape boldness. That's what it's called. Some guys have U shape where it's like the corners of their this and this go. You've studied all this stuff, haven't you? Yeah. It's her brand. Imagine if she's obviously No, because a lot of people don't think that like, you know, without being horrible, people may assume you're just an influencer, and I hate that word to be honest, but they they might think you're just endorsing or or some factories just hit you up and you're just created this, but there it's a lot deeper than that. You know, it is. And you know, like people are really invested into their hair care journey and hair is such a intimately personal, emotional thing. You know, I feel Did you feel more confident when you come back? I mean, if I'm honest, because I was on the show, I got everything like sorted out for me and I was like, I'll just do it. But I did get a little bit more confidence, but it was more when I had a bald head and I was this big muscle guy, it was more like when I went into certain rooms, I looked very intimidating. So, there's certain deals or certain brands that just didn't want to work with me. So when I got the good boy the good boyamama and it it done it it done wonders. It did. But I bet you have so many questions and you want them questions answered. So I think for me where I I'm in my DMs I answer all my DMs that I that I see and I will get people asking me intimate questions like this will happen. I had a baby and then postpartum hair loss d and I was like you know they're coming to me trusting me. How can I not give them the scientifically correct answer? So actually on Friday we're launching one-to-one consultations on my website. So probably when this goes live it will be available so you can book in for a half an hour slot with me to really get into depth of your hairare journey, what your goals are and how to maneuver that. I got half an hour now if you want to do it. Have you got uh have you got money? Yeah. So I I'll I'll book that. I'll DM you and book that. that the fact that you get back to everyone and there's something else that you do. This is Q&A sort of every other day I've seen and you give advice and like I I think that's really interactive. It's really nice what you do cuz she she gives life advice. No, but it isn't you're not just posting for the sake of posting as you do often. Yeah. Yeah. There's actual substance behind you're adding value, you know, which is important. There's a balance, you know, like I went viral recently. Shout out to DJ Lion. He did a remix with my voice to that. You know that song was like I'm looking for a guy in finance 65. Oh yeah. Yeah. I did the Asian one. I'm looking for a guy with brown eyes, long hair, low iron attitude. I've never gone that viral. I offered no value by going viral from that audio gain so many followers. So I think there's a balance of what you do, which is the virality kind of like side of things. equally approach to social media like how do I grow and I'm like if these are your followers why are we looking at Anna over there Jacob over here also I had three English names don't know why I said that name that's amazing no but as in the people that don't follow you why are we focusing so much on those why don't we pour into our existing community and focus on them because then organically via word of mouth d then spread the word of you so that's my biggest advice when it comes to people focusing on follower growth and That's where those videos of substance come in because I'm trying to give as much value and reward the people that already follow me as a thank you for following me because I'm profiting from having a social media page. But not only that, I'm getting the gratification for knowing that, you know, that little 12-year-old girl who was me who didn't understand what I mean, I was very lost with a lot of things growing up, like periods. I had no idea how they worked, was so confused when it happened to me. At least now if there's one girl that's out there that doesn't have a mom, she knows she can come to ARM and there's going to be a video about it or something and she's less alone. So I also get that gratification from it. So it's like a two too dynamic thing that you got to do with socials. See, a lot of people don't think about that. That's how deep that is. About what? Growing up without a mom. now going grow going out with a M and then these personal problems that women face and and that they have and then um something that I know you protect your you're very protective of your brand but I've also seen you advocate and you've been a very strong supporter of the a cause and there's a war in certain region and you've actually shed a little bit of light on your platform about that. Um the question is that without getting cancelled like why like why did you like as if in what gave you the guts to literally just stand up and be like you know what this isn't right what's going on here let me speak out about this because that was really powerful what you did. Thank you. I think as an influencer you're going to get pressured to talk about every single cause that happens. I'm sure you guys get it. there'll be a war in this country or a atrocity in that country and you can empathize and you can donate and you can handle it privately but it is not useful for you to speak on a topic that you're not familiar with. So anything that comes to Punjab causes or sick causes to the extent that I know I feel confident and educated about it I will bring awareness to it because this is the community that built this brand for me. These are the community that made me who I am. So who am I not to talk about the plight of my people? I actually work very very closely with the seek press association and behind the scenes I will have conversations with them. They will share assets with me. They will review videos for me if I ask them to just to ensure that the facts and figures and the information that I'm putting out there is verified. Yeah. So I would definitely recommend any influencer to work with an organization like that whether it's the sick association or it's something the equivalent in the Islam community something like that Muslim community because you stood up for the uh Palestine cause as well like you've been very supportive to just humanity in general and it doesn't go unnoticed man like it's it's it's impressive that you stood up at a time where every other influencer was really yeah shying away. I mean a lot of people in influential politicians haven't spoken about it because of the fear of losing followers or getting hate. But I mean I have a huge Muslim community that follow me. Like it's not just Punjabis out here. I'd say probably even like 40% of my followers are Muslim. Wow. Like how can I that's what I'm saying. How can I do them an injustice by not speaking up for a cause that is impacting not just their community, not just their countries, but the world. You know that one is a globally recognized one. Yeah. Yeah. Of course. Of course that. Oh, but big respect for that because um a lot of influencers stayed quiet. A lot of people they just didn't people are staying a lot of people just stayed quiet. Just that fear of it's ongoing. Yeah. Still happening now. Yeah. It's it's such a shame. It's such a shame. And and like there's going to be so many children now out there that will grow up without a parent or do you mean? M so I think you add so much value you know cuz your story I think that everyone needs to hear it and you know the way you dealt with grief is absolutely phenomenal because you you've turned that pain into something like so great where even old guys like us can benefit you know imagine like with a beard oil and like you know and it just adds value to people's lives so respect to you um and yeah no goip can I go yeah Yeah. All right. So, honestly, all that that aside, so I mean, you've come this far, you've done so much and you've achieved so much. What what do you see in the future of by Arim? I would love for us to be in like strong retailers. You know, already we're in Dean's Nami I mentioned earlier, but I feel that we have so much potential to have like instore presence. Uh, so I'd love to see us in the likes of Harvey Nichols. SpaceNK has always been a dream of mine. And I love the curation of brands. And then on a personal level, you know, we were speaking, I would love to be like actually on TV presenting just because I think I talk to my phone so much and I think I'm in that bubble of social media so much that I would love to be just one platform removed and just talk on TV about things like a QVC vibe. She would she'd be great on QVC. I could see her. Thing is where you've gifted us with a few of these, you know, beard oils. Like I'm going to give you a little golden nugget and just say start the Tik Tok live. Your show is there. Does that make sense? We can then give you an idea for Eron's reality TV show as well, but that's another conversation, isn't it? You know, but um you know your family and your friends like your closest Nerys and Deris, do they see like Eron the content creator, entrepreneur, or do they see this, you know, different side to you? Like what do your family and friends like think of you and see? I think like there's always an element that you guys can relate to as well, like you're going to show up as the persona or the character that you've created on social media. And I find it very easy to step into being Aram core because she is me. I'm not a fake person, but there's elements of Aram's of my personality that lend itself to Aram core. There's elements of my personality that lend itself to being the natural, relaxed, bit more subdued, bit more reserved, bit more shy person that I can also be. You know, we asked my friend this question before we answered and she said that you're an ambivert through and through. Sometimes I'll switch on. I'll be really extroverted. I'll be center of the room. I'll be talking. If you guys see me in exhibition where I'm selling my products, I'll be stood on the table. I've got my last hairbrush. Who wants it? But then if you guys catch me at home or with my friends, like I'm quietly just following them and I'm happy to be just silent, you know, going home. I love I put Bart on to like my prayer. I journal. I watch My Real Housewives of Atlanta. Like I just be in my little bubble and I love it. Wow, you're normal. Normal. So in the small amounts of spare time you do have, is that what you you enjoy just to turn off from the world? Yeah, I guess. So and I like going gym as well as we mentioned earlier. Yeah. It's like a social thing as well, you know, when you're used to your gym. Yeah. So it feels like that. those people don't know me as Aram core unless they follow me or something like that like sometimes they do but I can kind of just show up in the way that I feel on that day without feeling a pressure of because at the end of the day you know like you hear about it all the time you know a celebrity has had not that I'm celebrity but they've had a bad day then they're you know not coming across well to waiters or something and then the waiter then goes and sells a story to heat magazine and they were awful they came in they were mooty oh yeah and I'm quite aware of that and not that I'm even remotely relevant enough for people to talk about in that way but I would want to ensure that everybody that does meet me gets to know the real me and gets to experience like you know what I met that arm girl you know the hair oil one she was actually kind of nice I want at the bare minimum someone to be able to walk away knowing that about me do you feel that you get caught in a space sometimes where you're chasing not you personally just in general being in that space validation yeah cuz me's talking about this off camera I feel that the people that are in the public eye cuz obviously and friends I've had in the industry. You need you you're all striving for that whether it's from some sort of trauma you you you've experienced or other things in your life. It's whether it's an insecurity all of us have I don't know but we're all trying to seek that little bit of validation from people. Are you do you feel that that's something you still do? Because I've found with age I care a lot less about that now. Now I am. Yeah. But I was seeking validation from everyone before and I was always concerned about what will I'm like bro. And now like I don't care. The more I don't care the more success I'm seeing which is insane. I really love to hear that. I think my moral compass is set by my dad. Like if I do something and my dad says to my mom that was wrong that will hurt me. That that's the validation that I want. I want to know that like my dad's like you did the right thing there. And I think cuz we grew up so close and I say grew up cuz he grew up with us. You know, he was 23 when I was born. So he's like my big brother sometimes. I look to him regarding that moral compass side of things in the external. I definitely have always been prior to even having social media someone that does care about the way that I portray myself. But if I'm being totally raw with you guys, I think it comes from me not having a female role model. I had no aunties, no cousins, no sisters. So all I had was my dudi. But we know you know when it's a grandparent they're not necessarily understanding how to fit into modern world they are just the entity of a grand of a grandma right so I was always looking to the women around me what is the signal to know that this is the way that a woman is to behave in this scenario like at weddings I would I would sit with on my dad on the guy side sit on the guy side with my dad cuz I did not know the responsibility of a woman I did not get taught it so I think that place that I come from which is wanting to be perceived well is essentially wanting to be perceived correctly which is I am doing the right thing that girls meant to do right like girls are meant to sit like this right I think as I've grown older and I've developed more and more relationships with women I've got a godmother now like I've come to learn but if you know me and I think and you're quite a perceptive person I'm a very observant person when it comes to women I be watching the way that they're behaving the mannerisms the way that they're talking and I'm absorbing all of it even at 30 I'm absorbing all of it yeah but is Is there a right way for a woman or a man to sit or does that make sense? Like, you know, I think in this day and age, a lot of people would say, "No, I'm very very into etiquette." So, I learn about all of these things and I research it and everything. And I think there is so much grace to be said with a woman that can handle herself and hold herself in a very feminine, not even openly feminine, but like as a woman, there's a difference between a woman and a man. And I think there's so much grace to knowing and handling yourself the way that you want to be perceived by the world. If I wanted to lean into more masculine, I would know the qualities that would enable me to do that. I would change my body language and everything. But, you know, would you do it? No. Today, I'm sitting in the feminine. No, because the thing is that's cuz I agree with you on that. But the world and society might not because they're a lot more everything's I don't want to go down that close-minded man. A lot of them are. They would say it's open-mindedness and wokeness, but it's my personal choice how you express yourself. So you you could do anything that you wanted to do and it's not my decision how you handle yourself, but it's my decision how I handle myself. And that's all you can control in this world. And I'm choosing to present myself in this way and to research about Etica and to follow the women that I think are are demonstrating to me the way that I aspire to be. If there's a woman that aspires to be a different way, that's her personal choice and she is 100% in her right to express it that way and I will stand by her thick and thin. I really believe that. Thank you for that. 100%. Um, can I talk about something slightly controversial now? Okay, cool. All right, so basically I love this part cuz Oasis doesn't know what Angie's going to say and then my guest is also himself thinking and so reckless sometimes. But um, here we are. So, a couple of weeks ago, you asked me to help your one of your friends find a risha or something like that, right? Um, and I remember I replied to you and I said, I don't know if you watched the show that me and a waste were. I had a little bit of a disaster doing that. I remember what when did that happen? Why what did you try and do? Basically, I was like saying I was I was I was saying uh are you with me? Yeah. Okay. Yeah. I don't remember the show. I was like in year seven. Oh, okay. Okay. So, no, I I basically I said to Aram, I said show is old, isn't it? It is. It's really old. I I was saying um I I can't do this because if I introduce your friend to someone Yeah. and that messes up, I'm responsible and I'm accountable for that mess up. You didn't think about that 10 years ago, did you, bro? It doesn't matter. It's irrelevant now cuz you are in a beautiful space right now. So, that's that's that's good. That's very good, isn't it? But what's your thoughts on Cuz I remember you kind you didn't bait me out, but you did answer the question on your social media. Social media and I love that you did that because it was just like guys, you know, what did you say again? I can't remember cuz it was it was awesome. I just think like what you could do to change someone's life, which is to introduce someone to the level of their life potentially. The good of doing that outweighs the potential risk of that person being insane, basically. And I think that we can't account for the way that your friend shows up as an insane person in a romantic relationship because everyone's different romantically, platonically. You don't know your friend in a romantic sense. Whoever they may be, person A, you don't know how they are. And I feel like I'm not reading the context of this conversation. Well, no, you are. You're hitting. You're hitting it. This is you. So it's really interesting to hear that because this is why when she said very interesting to hear that because I'm when she said this on I was like I'm going to mention this I have to because it was insane. Sorry. Carry on. So listen like you are not accountable and any intelligent person if type person A has turned around and been insane they're not going to come to you because they're going to be like oh you obviously don't know them in a romantic sense so you are not to blame but imagine the absolute reward that you would get karmically for introducing someone to the love of their life and changing their life like giving them a husband or a or a wife enabling them to take that next step into children etc like what a blessing so I think it's worth the risk personally I'm always looking out for my girlfriend. So what you're saying is forget about Tinder and Hinge and Bumble. People should just hit you up and say find me a dishab here. Go back to arranged marriages. Please don't hit me up. There you go guys. Looking for always. What's your take on that? Like do you agree with that? Cuz that was I mean um it's an interesting take on it. you. It's so nice to hear someone so positive about it because the world and people are quite negative in general and a lot of people are insane. Yeah. And um I mean we know people who have been and I'm not going to talk about introduce me. Yeah. I've done it in the past where I've I've help tried to help and be that nice guy and I ended up in where I was like, "Oh, you introduced me to you." And then I mean the blame game starts in it. An emotionally intelligent person to blame you for the actions of someone else. Like you would never knowingly introduce someone to a bad guy or a bad girl. Do you know what I mean? Like you're doing the best with the information that you have at the time. Now you know. You know, but not No, I get you cuz not everyone's like that and some people are going to blame you, but it's not an advanced way to think. looking at the world in a very positive way and hoping that people think along the same lines as you whereas I'm not sure if a lot of people do. Yeah. But this is why again I love that if the whole world thought like you would be a very peaceful and h no honestly peaceful and happy place cuz you've found your or you're working on that every day to find happiness and build your own happiness and you're thinking that if I can give someone else that joy however it is which is an awesome way to think because as I said the world there's a lot of sadness and anger and stuff in the world. So as I said if everyone thought like you would be great and you practice uh gratitude every morning every day we see it the same way we pray like fudger prayer you're you know um posting wahur on my stories and it holds me accountable cuz I know that people are expecting me to post it every day so I make sure the first thought I have is wahuru because that word basically you could have an equivalent if you were just someone that is into spirituality you could wake up and say gratitude or you could alhamdulillah or whatever it is that you feel comfortable saying, as long as that is this first thought that you have in your mind in the morning, I think it sets the tone for your day. And I want to encourage people to do that. Not just six that follow me, but whatever word means something to you to wake up and say that first. I like that. That's beautiful, man. That's deep. I'm going to start that. What praying f in the mornings? Yeah, it's changed my life, man. Honestly, I can see. No, no, I mean getting up with that positive. Yeah, because it can be hard at times. How has it changed your life praying for you in the morning? Like for me, just being up that early, seeing the sun rise, it it just does something to you. I can't explain it. It's literally like witnessing a miracle every morning. Wow. Wow. I swear I'm in such a different headsp space right now. It's done something that I said to Angie year at the start of the year. And goes, "What are your resolutions this year?" I went, "I want to create time." Oh, yeah. For myself. Yeah. cuz time is the one thing everybody wants but they can't get back because it's gone. So what he's done, he's created time which is unbelievable. It's insane. And and where I am right now and I can I can see like I didn't I learned this recently. Your brain doesn't know the difference between something that you think about deeply and something that has really happened. So what she manifests and her positive energy talking about oh marriage this or that the other the positive light and she don't see the negative. Yeah, I know. So her reality is great. Aim's reality is different to everyone else and that's probably why you're going to be so much more successful and you're hitting like every note and you know you're you're getting success because you're manifesting it. Thank you. Thank you. And it's thanks to people like you guys like in these types of positions, men as well like in general like giving access to opportunities to women like me to people from our background that helps to elevate us as a community. So thank you so much for creating this space for people like me. We have to man that's what cultured chaos is about to celebrate you know our culture. It's about now because in our culture I think women are achieving and doing so much more and they're striving. They've gone past us I think personally but I mean you go so it's it's important to em embrace that and celebrate it 100%. And before we wrap up I want to say Eram would you ever do a reality show like the Eram show. Would you ever do that cuz I think it would really suit your brand and yourself you know I think so. I never thought about it but I think I would. That's an idea. We'll speak to her. Yeah. Why not? One one people my dad. Shout out to you. Yeah. Like insight into your life and what you do and how everything works. I think that's the world now. People are so engrossed into everyone else's. What does she do? What's she doing in the morning? Why is she doing it like this? What car is she driving? What she do? It's honestly 100%. Let's do it. 100%. Eram, it's been an absolute pleasure to have you on Cultured Chaos. Eron core an oasis con.